tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19489883370417292652023-06-20T22:00:55.290-07:00The April Project 2007Boog City Eventshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01736859750137242913noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1948988337041729265.post-86660597447636015552007-04-09T14:21:00.001-07:002008-03-04T17:38:47.888-08:0004.01.07<br /><br />philip and i were driving up to mohegan sun<br />to see the p.b.a. toc,<br />that’s professional bowlers’ association tournament of champions<br />to all of you who aren’t as cool as us<br />when my cell phone rang while we were on i95<br />somewhere in connecticut.<br /><br />“uncle david? it’s michelle”<br />“hey sweetie.”<br />“where do you live in the city?”<br />“”28th street and 8th avenue, why?”<br />“i came into the city with daddy to see a show, and i don’t know where he is. we got separated, and i don’t know what to do. i’m on 40th and 8th.”<br />“have you called him?”<br />“he isn’t answering his cellphone and neither is mommy.”<br />“i’m not in the city, i’m driving to connecticut. let me think for a second. mmm, are there any …<br />“april fool’s.”<br /><br />it was now a toss-up as to whether i was prouder of her for this<br />or singing g-d bless america <br />during the 7th inning stretch at shea <br />from the top of the mets dugout a few years back<br /><br /><br />04.02.07<br /><br />(sing)<br /><br />why does your soap have to be scented<br />in every room i go<br />when i wash my hands in the bathroom<br />not unscented hypoallergenic<br />but instead a somehow flowery blend of cranberry and nuts<br /><br />i don’t want my hands to smell<br />for the rest of the evening<br />so i think i’ll use your dish soap<br />yes i think i’ll use your dish soap.<br />joy, oh joy<br /><br /><br />04.03.07<br /><br />the radio’s on in the kitchen<br />this first morning of this passover<br />and everyone’s gathered around the table<br />as my dad makes us matzah brei for breakfast<br />my sister-in-law points out<br />that it’s cristina aguilera on the radio<br />and i started to say how she once a whore<br />in the way she would dress and what she’d sing,<br />any my eldest niece amy,<br />my 18-yr-old niece amy,<br />launched a vicious defense,<br />defending her by attacking me<br />all without taking a breath<br />and this seemed real strange<br />as her tastes go more toward the fake punk rock<br />and when she didn’t let up i did what any good debater does,<br />i went for her weakest point.<br />“wow, your father’s right, you are just like him.<br />you are just like my brother.”<br />and quickly we had a little more room at the table this morning.<br /><br /><br />04.04.07<br /><br />(sing)<br /><br />if i could be your friend<br />i’d be the best friend that i could be<br />we would go for walks in the park<br />i’d give you a boost to climb that old tree (that you like)<br /><br />if i could be your friend<br />i would tell the whole world<br />because i think they’d be cool with another mass email<br />as in the park we twirled (our batons)<br /><br />if i could be your friend<br />we could lead a parade<br />down avenue a into tompkins square park<br />watch reruns of we got it made (shorty shea)<br />watch reruns of we got it made<br /><br /><br />04.05.07<br /><br />email from my big sister<br />whose real estate magazine i copy edit<br />jack kennedy died she mentioned<br />and we had to write a few words about him<br />but jack kennedy died four decades ago<br />so i ignore her<br />until she emails me again<br />says jack kennedy was a union man,<br />and read the newsday article last week.<br /><br />and so i write here these few lines and email her back:<br /><br />as this issue went to press jack kennedy, a legendary figure in our industry passed away. kennedy, the president of the building & construction trade council of nassau-suffolk, will be missed. he is most known for his wanting to gather people to help themselves. "ask not what your trade council can do for you," kennedy said memorably, "ask what you can do for your trade council."<br /><br />her next email’s subject line:<br /><br />edited by me - kennedy is this okay? how do we know he was most known for this?<br /><br /><br />04.06.07<br /><br />we’re watching the show numbers from my parents’ bed<br />mom on the right dad on the left,<br />i crawl up between them a little bit<br />then realize i need pillows to see the tv.<br /><br />04.07.07<br /><br />tried to watch fear and loathing in las vegas with ian<br />in long island in my parents’ den<br />but after an hour there was no plot<br />and we weren’t high<br />so we switched to pay-per-view the people vs. john lennon<br />but i kept looking at the running time<br />as the movie proceeded<br />and the film only dealt with the actual court case from the title<br />for about 20 minutes<br />though it was nice seeing abbie hoffman,<br />as always.<br /><br />04.08.07<br /><br />poets are suing poets<br />over poet stuff<br />over interviews given to an online anthology<br />now trying to be gathered into a print version.<br />they didn’t get your permission?<br />then give it to them and be done with it.<br />get your contributor’s copies and be done with it.<br />once you’ve said it online everyone has it anyways,<br />so get over it,<br />please.<br /><br /><br />04.09.07<br /><br />we’re watching move over, darling<br />this 1963 doris day movie<br />where james garner plays her husband<br />“she’s looking old for him,” i tell my folks.<br />we’re going to play this game that i like to play<br />just with my mom, dad, and me,<br />what year was doris day born?<br />what day was james garner born?<br />i write down everyone’s guesses<br />and dad got james garner’s year, 1928,<br />and i got doris day’s, 1924.<br /><br />did you know he was born james baumgarner?<br /><br /><br />04.10.07<br /><br />i still can’t get over the gilmore girls<br />how i enjoy the episodes<br />again and again,<br />but tonight another rerun,<br />come back<br />to me,<br />please.<br /><br /><br />04.11.07<br /><br />finally home<br />after 10 days away<br />sanjaya’s safe and so am i<br /><br /><br />04.12.07<br /><br />(sing)<br /><br />i would like just lynn xu<br />to read to me all of the time<br />i don’t know if her work is good<br />it’s always weird the tricks that the ears play<br />but i know how a voice sounds,<br />and like how her voice sounds<br />low, semisoft moved by rhythm and tone<br />i would like just lynn xu<br />to read to me all of the time<br /><br /><br />04.13.07<br /><br />didn’t want to leave my apartment to have dinner with my folks,<br />didn’t want to go downstairs to get food they brought<br />all i wanted to do was keep the lights off as the sun set<br />all i wanted to do was take a nap.<br /><br /><br />04.14.07<br /><br />sports radio 66 wfan to bed<br />as always<br />and a caller is comparing<br />what was done to don imus<br />with what eugene mccarthy did with communism in the ’60s<br />saying it again.<br />the host doesn’t correct him,<br />and for a second i wanna call up<br />but i don’t feel like getting out of bed.<br /><br /><br />04.15.07<br /><br />everyone is wearing number 42 on the dodgers today<br />25 of the 300 plus players honoring the memory of jackie robinson<br />on the 60th anniversary of the rebreaking of the color barrier in major league baseball<br />by wearing his number,<br />retired by baseball 10 years ago today.<br />this couldn’t be done with football<br />because the announcers would be confused <br />as to who caught a pass, who a penalty was against, <br />no matter how well they paid attention.<br /><br /><br />04.16.07<br /><br />last minute details to iron out<br />what are yr dreams about<br />yeah<br />what are yr dreams about<br /><br />take me out again<br />and ride me home<br />It’s how it should be<br />Yeah, yeah, yeah<br />It’s how it should be<br />Yeah, yeah, yeah<br /><br /><br />04.17.07<br /><br />how do you find yr way home<br />when yre already there<br />lorelai gilmore<br />walking out of the haybale maze<br /><br /><br />04.19.07<br /><br />$15 being taken out of my commerce bank account<br />I thought they were the good bank<br />Good bank<br /><br /><br />04.21.07<br /><br />work on the paper all day<br />blow off yr birthday dinner<br />but we know I probably would have blown it off<br />although I love you<br />see I don’t feel like seeing people who I kinda sorta know<br />much more than I have to<br />right now<br /><br /><br />04.22.07<br /><br />75 degrees,<br />the straps of yr purse dividing yr tanktop,<br />you arrive in the third inning<br />and for the first time i’m ok with that.<br />i ignore yr boyfriend.<br /><br />you leave in the sixth<br />but i wait to spread out a seat more<br />and you two return in the bottom of the seventh<br />and yre eating chocolate carvel<br />w/colored sprinkles<br />out of an upturned mets helmet.<br />75 degrees.<br /><br /><br />04.25.07<br /><br />10 yrs later<br />on lithium<br />not me working<br />at a porn mag<br />calmed down a bit<br />life med-ing me down<br />get some sleep<br />then twirl around<br /><br />04.26.07<br /><br />sent the paper to the printer<br />and I should not have masturbated<br />should have gone to sleep right away<br />but I wanted to relax<br />and then on 90 minutes of sleep<br />I trained out to long island<br />Met my mother<br />Got the car<br />Then drove out to the printer<br />And the map from their website<br />It got me lost in long island city<br />before i called and got directions<br />and then he said<br />reverse everything I just told you<br />and one block later <br />I knew where I was<br />Picked up the papers<br />And picked up jon to help distribute<br />And we didn’t know how to get to Williamsburg<br />By taking the streets<br />So we took the lie to the bqe<br />And then we started to distribute papers<br />Before lower east side yonah schimmel kasha knish stop<br />And then we kept going<br />Before I left him at the f on 23rd street<br />It was rush hour and I didn’t want to sit in traffic<br />So I parked across from London terrace<br />Where I once saw teri hatcher<br />I had to sit in the car until six o’clock<br />When you could park there<br />And I went home to my apartment<br />Did some work on the computer<br />Dad said he needed the car back that night <br />so after gray’s anatomy<br />I drove back to long island<br />For 11:30<br />But did not go straight to bed<br />Had gray’s anatomy and October road<br />To watch<br />I think I need to get to sleep now.<br /><br /><br />04.27.07<br /><br />the collection man is bad cop today<br />his mr. good cop has gone away<br />he wants me to borrow from peter to pay paul<br />but I tell him I can’t pay at all<br />which turns the collection man to bad cop today<br />and it seems he will not go awayBoog City 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